No desire, no resistance, no suffering

  We arrive at every moment in life with certain desires, expectations, and with intentions of what we have to offer and/or take. We also bring an energy that reflects our intentions. Our energy is  a result of our thoughts, emotions, values, and the ability to manage our behavior. We function to have our basic needs of survival met, but often we depend on our senses having pleasure to be able to enjoy a moment. We then feel disappointed when our senses aren't being satisfied and can't enjoy that moment. Desire always results in suffering.

   Since we all know what it is like to be some where you don't want to be, we have all experienced resistance to being in a moment. It could be in traffic, just broke 2 ribs and have no income, at your dead end job at any hour, hearing a song you can't stand at target, or the story of old people walking 10 Miles a day uphill both ways in the snow and barefoot to get to school. If you are suffering a terminal illness or just waiting too long for fast food when you're high at 12:3am you recognize the suffering that comes with resistance. The feeling of dread that accompanies this is a well known result of resistance. Resistance always results in suffering.

   If our intention is to enjoy moments of life we must recognize the need for balance between no desire and no resistance. This state of being free from want, at the same time as acceptance of any circumstance. Not needing any thing external, because our intention is to choose to be grateful for right now. There is a place of refuge. If you ask yourself  "what it would be like if you could be happy no matter was going on in life?", and then realize that option is available by your choice. At any given time you can experience rest like shelter in a storm. Refuge is always available, it is the spot that is calm in the middle of every storm. You tell yourself it makes no sense to be happy, and just choose to be happy. It didn't realize this was always an option until about two and half years ago. Now is better.

 

Combating the stress response

 Most of us have heard of the fight or flight response, a physiological response that allows our body to escape danger in a life threatening situation. We also experience this in intense moments of fear, specific phobias, or crisis moments we refer to as stress. Our nervous system response is the same if we imagine ourselves being in a actual life threatening situation or not. This response was meant for means of survival, yet we find this happens in day to day life resulting in increased blood pressure, higher heart rate, and a release of many chemicals in our blood stream that stress the body. It happens automatically, and we don't really notice. This is why stress causes the body problems.

  What happens in our brains when this hits? Think of some one conducting a symphony, responsible for all the outcome. The part of the brain that is like the conductor of the stress response symphony is the amygdala, and it sends the signal to the hypothalamus to kick start the party. The hypothalamus will release hormones, like notes of a scary piece of music we hear in movies when some bad shit is about to go down. This is when we feel the effects. This symphony is sponsored by the sympathetic nervous system. Then we pause are remember it's just a movie.

  So in our everyday life we need to stop and remember most of the thoughts that cause of stress, are things that aren't actually happening.
The important part of this, is the pause. We turn to another piece of music like switching a station. The next symphony piece is sponsored by the parasympathetic nervous system, and the conductor of this is the vagus nerve. Releasing a calming effect.

   Both of these symphonies can be turned on, or off. When we get lost in thoughts of worry we are essentially fantasizing and turning on the fear response. Hearing the notes that strike a sense of doom, like repeating a negative thought pattern. We may even hear this in the company of negative people, it may seem to be the soundtrack of your work day, and we become so used to it we don't hear it only feel it.

    Learning to turn on the calming effects of the parasympathetic symphony conducted by the vagus nerve can most easily be accessed by slow deep breathing. This conductor is also responsible for the mind body connection, and can not only calm you down, but strengthen your immune system as well many other beneficial physiological benefits. Meditation is another way to hear and feel this. Yawning, and immersion of your face in cold water are some fast ways to tap into this as well.

  The most effective way to fast results, is the practice the pause. Notice how your body is responding. Then realize you have a choice to change the vibration of sound and feel the stress, or the calming.