Resilience

   Resilience is a word we hear and associate with the character of a person that is able to bounce back from set backs, and even thrive in adversity. This is something almost every one wants to be good at, and it seems that some just are. However, according to psychology resilience is a process of adapting well in adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats,  or significant sources of stress. How we respond to uncertainty is a result in what we have practiced. Those who don't practice will react with out thought and continue to be crushed that things are uncertain. Don't be surprised, be prepared.

    I would like to share five practices I believe will help with adapting and overcoming circumstance and will assist in the future if you actually practice. Think of these things as creating the causes for resilience. Each practice will have its own reward. Keep in mind that you will master what you practice eventually. Also the good news of the brain being able to change patterns. We don't have to believe we are just wired to worry, or prone to anger or depression. You can choice to practice new ways of thinking and change your brain.

1. Perspective. This is a perhaps the most essential in our ability to respond with wisdom, or react with emotional outrage each time things are not to our perfect comfort level. There is another way of looking at that, and of course that leaves us with options. If you view all problems as opportunities then you would never have another problem again. There is something to be learned in all things, nothing goes to waste. Seeing the benefit of everything and value of each living being. So many people will spend time in anger, blame, and feeling a victim. That will only cause conditions for further suffering and takes you from a place of personal responsibility as well as the opportunity to learn. This also allows the perfect platform for problem solving, or ways to maximize all opportunities and create hopeful strategies. Embracing uncertainty because you view nothing a problem anymore.

 2. Acceptance. Often thought of as a stage of grief, however it is simply just the real place of acceptance that sounds very logical. It's like this now, and there is often nothing we can do to change it. Understanding impermanence of all living things is a practice that will result in loving others and each moment more. Resistance is the most common obstacle here that we see when we get into thoughts of should have, would have, could have. Spending tine thinking what you think shoukd have happened wont help. Taking you away from acceptance. Recovery will be faster when we recognize that all things are uncertain. This is where healing starts.

3. Self care. The way we take care of ourselves is crucial to be ready able to perform in any moment.  This refers to physical activity, and includes strength, endurance, flexibility, balance, all as equally important. To get proper nutrition and adequate water  is a challenge in itself, but we make it a priority. Getting enough rest is definitely something that so many people struggle with  and sadly what they long for is sleep, yet the lack of inhibits physical and mental performance. Training your mind is also a overlooked aspect of self care. This can be done with meditation, visualizations techniques for skill improvement, learning new skills, ect. It is also very important to schedule time to do things we enjoy.

4. Sitting in silence / being mindful. The ability to sit still or in silence is that of a person who has great self control. While the rest of us just see our minds wander nonstop and feel like we are trying to keep up. It does not always have to be so. Sitting still in silence paying attention to our breath, and then we just view our thoughts and feelings. They come and go with no restraint like the weather, yet we can just observe and not be attached. For example making a mistake, that is not permanent and it is not who you are. Like a storm, all things are only like this right now. Allow yourself to see what comes up, just see it. Being in states of meditation can simply be spending time being grateful. Thinking of wishing loving kindness to others. It also offers a understanding that there is refuge despite what goes on around you. A calm mind is that.

5. Connection. Having a good support system is obviously a bonus. This can be friends or family,  coworkers, ect. Every one you know is good at something different. Being around people that you don't have to filter any thing is a great thing. Having friends that will be with you and care where you are at. The people that are in your life influence you in some manner. It is very important to be around others that have your best interest at heart. There is a sharing of life together with out judgment. Connection is also what we spend our time watching and listening to.

   Practicing these things allow for the process of resilience to come naturally. Adversity is part of life,  as is impermanence. Don't be surprised, be prepared. Self discipline is the path to freedom.